Happy Week 12! We officially have our first “e” of the season, congratulations to Dave’s Washington Commandeses for being the first elimination of the year. He fought hard, and will continue to play spoiler for the rest of the league. Will there be more teams joining Dave on the eliminated train after this week? I guess we’ll see. Ranking and Previews below:
RANKINGS:
- Buck-ee’s – Quin Davis (8-3 / PF:1475)
- Quantitative – Andrew Arney (7-4 / PF: 1302)
- 1st Down Syndrome – Lance Taylor (7-3-1 / PF: 1238)
- Everyone Dead – Matt Sherrick (6-5 / PF: 1429)
- Lemme See Your Pitts – Jake Odenweller (6-5 / PF: 1309)
- Catching Cases, Not Passes – Giovanni Franzese (6-5 / PF: 1282)
- CHASE’N TAIL – Dillon Reisinger (6-5 / PF: 1251)
- Saquon Deez Nuts – Evan Tooley (5-6 / PF: 1336)
- Addison HenRae – Reed Pike (4-6-1 / PF: 1248)
- Charlie’s Team – Drake Olson (5-6 / PF: 1225)
- 2026 BK Champs – Jared Reiss (3-8 / PF: 1194)
- Eliminated
MATCHUP PREVIEWS:
Quin Davis – Buck-ee’s (Proj: 142) vs Reed Pike – Addison HenRae (Proj: 120)
It’s the battle of commissioner’s this week (Reed is a fantasy basketball commissioner for those who didn’t know hehe). One of these teams is about close to putting it into cruise control, and the other is fighting for their life. Reed absolutely drummed Evan last week, putting up north of 140 points and keeping his season alive. He still has a chance to be the Cinderella of the season, but it starts with a win this week. I like Reed, he’s a nice guy, pretty cute, makes a mean cocktail, but the boys are humming right now. Maybe the dogs will get called off, maybe CMC grabs some bench and Brian Robinson gets the start. Or maybe I just put Reed out of his misery and let him focus 100% of his attention on basketball instead of his current 92%.
Evan Tooley – Saquon Deez Nuts (Proj: 110) vs Dillon Reisinger – CHASE’N TAIL (Proj: 104)
MUST WIN GAME FOR BOTH PARTIES INVOLVED! Let’s start with Evan. My GOD I don’t think I’ve ever seen worse injury luck in a single season. Congrats Evan, you just acquired Josh Jacobs! *dies immediately* Oh man that’s bad luck, at least you still have Drake London! *dies immediately* I feel genuinely sorry for this team because even with all the injuries, they are still able to compete and potentially sneak into the playoffs. As for Dillon, he got a massive dump dropped on his chest last week by the person he absolutely hates the most. And to make matters worse? Ja’marr Chase turned into a fucking Llama last weekend and now has to serve a 1 game suspension at possibly the worst time of the year. With Achane also on a bye this week, Dillon is going to have to scratch and claw to keep his postseason hopes alive. This matchup will be one to follow.
Drake Olson – Charlie’s Team (Proj: 124) vs Lance Taylor – 1st Down Syndrome (Proj: 123)
Another massive game. Lance fighting for a 1 seed, Drake fighting to not finish 6-8 for the 5th season in a row. Lance saw the stat last week about never scoring above 120 and proceeded to shove his middle finger in the face of the media, dropping 147 and fisting Sherrick. Drake on the other hand got reminded that there are levels to this shit, and dropped below .500 with his lose. On paper, this is a very even matchup. No Ladd and no Sutton for Drake hurt a bit, but you have to give the kid some big brain props for stashing Emanuel Wilson the last few weeks. For his sake, he better hope Jacobs doesn’t play. Lance will continue to rely on the MVP Mr. Allen, accompanied by his sidekicks Bijan and Kyren. This game will come down to the role players, and a win this week will go a long way.
Jared Reiss – 2026 BK Champs (Proj: 104) vs Andrew Arney – Quantitative (Proj: 129)
Jared is playing spoiler right now, that’s what the rest of his season is all about. He got fucked by injuries, some of his players just shit the bed, but he can still kill the hopes of others. Andrew on the other hand, he’s salivating at the thought of a first round bye, and it’s right in front of him. I feel like every week I (the analysts) write these, Andrew is playing a sub .500 team. Some people are questioning his strength of schedule, but one thing you can’t question is his team. Well, you can actually for sure question his team, but this week they are poised to put up some big numbers. The oddsmakers see this game being an absolute blowout – but maybe JR can get 30 points from Chris Brooks? Crazier things have happened.
Dave Carney – Dave’s Washington Commandeses (Proj: 105) vs Jake Odenweller – Lemme See Your Pitts (Proj: 129)
This matchup should have an explicit content warning posted on it, we might see a real life SA in person. Jake has a bold green arrow pointing up for his team right now. Is Kenneth Walker good? Is Hampton going to come back next week? Are Chris Rodriguez and RJ Harvey league winners? Lot’s of positive things going on for this squad. Every game is a must win, and this SHOULD be an easy one, but you can never count your chickens before they hatch. Just like how you can never count your rings before a guy dies on the field during a game.
Gio Franzese – Catching Cases, Not Passes (Proj: 122) vs Matt Sherrick – Everyone Dead (Proj: 127)
GAME OF THE WEEK ALERT
6-5 vs 6-5. AFC team vs AFC team. Bad blood resurfaces. This matchup will be cinema! Gio dropped an unfortunate game to JR last week, failing to eclipse 90 points. That might sound like the worst performance of the week right? WRONG. Sherrick had Taylor on a bye and the rest of his team decided to take the week off as well, as he failed to score 70 points. Bounce back spots for both of these teams this week, and my god is this matchup huge. I might go as far as to say the winner of this matchup makes the playoffs and the loser starts planning their offseason vacation. Gio is fighting an uphill battle from the start, as Marv and Herb won’t be suiting up for this contest. If there was ever a time for Gibbs, Bowers, Javonte, and Egbuka to put the team on their backs, that time is now. On the other side, Sherrick gets Thanos back in the lineup as JT is set to take on the Chiefs in a massive real-life NFL game. JSN and Devonta also have a couple of peachy matchups, as they get the Titans and Cowboys. Gio needs to jumpstart his week with a stinker from “(I’ve got a) Woody Marks” tonight on TNF – a bad game from him could be just what he needs to get his team going come Sunday.
Cheers to a great Week 12! – Commish